Confessions of a Korean-American Man in New York City

There was nothing to do in the booming metropolis known as Sheboygan. We did manage to find the Skybox sports bar for dinner one evening. It was littered with paraphernalia from the U of Wisconsin, Packers and Brewers. We were hoping to see the Eagles vs. Jets preseason game, but when we entered, there were only 2 things being watched among the 15 TVs situated around the restaurant: Packers preseason and the Brewers game. We asked if we could have one TV show the Eagles vs. Jets game. The women never returned after that request and we never got to see the game. This is Packer land and it's a religion.

Instead of watching another move at the local multiplex, we decided to drive up north to Green Bay; this would be the first and last time I'd ever step foot in that town. We saw Lambau field from a distance. Unlike Sheboygan, Green Bay has a casino called Oneida (Indian Tribe). Wherever we 3 stooges travel, we always manage to find a casino. Let me list the casinos I've stepped foot in over the last few years: Las Vegas (almost all of the them), Dominican Republic, Bahamas, St. Marteen, Nice, Monaco, London, Atlantic City, Mohegan Sun, Phoenix, California and others that I can't remember off the top of my head. We did try getting into the Cannes' casino a few weeks ago but we were rejected because of our beach attire.

My accumulated losses are only in 5 digits, which is somewhat of a relief but they're losses nonetheless. I know gambling is a hopeless cause but it's a diversion from boredom, especially when you find yourself in remote places at night.

Why do I gamble? It's just thrilling when you win. When the dice roll your point; you hit blackjack with a big bet; you flop a full house and slow play for a big pot; it's a great feeling. Unfortunately for me, it's few and far in between having these thrills. I've changed games to 3 card poker because it requires less thinking and you can grind it out with a few hundred bucks. The beauty of 3 card poker is that you can lose 7 straight hands, but once you hit a straight flush or a 3 of a kind, you get a 40:1 or 30:1 payout and you're back in the game grinding again.

If I had all the money in the world to play, I'd roll the dice: it's both fun and exhausting. Watching the dice roll around and clank against the far end of the table is actually scintillating. You're hoping that the dice doesn't sum up to a 7; that is if you're betting the pass line. I remember my first night at the craps table. I had beginners luck as I rolled 5 straight points and people were shouting "go shooter" and " go John." No, that's not my real name but when you're in Vegas, you never give out your real name. If you do, make sure you provide a different spelling of it so no one can Google you later. Ever since that night at the Rio, it's been down hill. I have the incredible ability to roll 7s after securing the point. If you're ever at the craps table with me and the dice gets passed to me, I'd recommend the No Pass because I'll crap out.

All the casinos are the same, except for the varying clientèle. Most of them are depressing because you see Sr. Citizens who are spending their SS checks on the slots and not on their meds. There are also a lot of degenerates in the casinos -- more so in the underground poker rooms that I've gone to in NY. Those are really scary places -- go watch the movie Rounders. The only places where you don't see this as much are at the high end casinos like Wynn and Bellagio. There's always a mix of Asians in most casinos because it's in our DNA to gamble. The proof is at the ATMs in casinos. You'll notice that the language options at ATMs in AC and Las Vegas are English, Spanish, Chinese, Japanese and Korean.

Las Vegas is like a brothel. You get all excited and nervous upon entering Vegas, but by the end, you're exhausted and feeling dirty and ready to run home and take a shower. The casinos in the islands I consider dangerous. They're locally owned and not necessarily by a company ie Wynn, Harrahs, and so they rule those places like the days of Vegas and the Mob. Just don't f' with them and don't win to much because you have to remember, you're stuck on an island.